Preparing for War- battlefield series

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01 July 2014 by n8tivegirl,Copyright protected, all rights reserved

Preparing For War:

How does one prepare for battle when they aren’t sure who their enemy is? What strategic planning does one do? Is it entirely a mind game, a battle against flesh and blood – or is it a spiritual fight? I know my enemy, yet he eludes me with his various disguises. He knows my weaknesses, but You know my strong points. I prepare for battle each day, and I think of ways to protect myself from his wrath. Some days I’m careful not to step on any of the minefields or the traps that he has laying hidden on the battlefield.

Battlefield

Don’t try to explain your mind
I know what’s happening here
One minute, it’s love
And, suddenly, it’s like a battlefield
One word turns into a war.

There are days that I am tired of this fight, but I have come to realize that God sometimes uses extreme measures for extreme circumstances – that force us to fight for the victory. We often get comfortable on the battlefield, we think like the Israelites who thought slavery was better than the wilderness. We are afraid to move forward for fear that we might be free, or that we might win. The battle is not yours, it is the Lord’s. And as a soldier of war, I know the scars that hide behind the mask, and I also know the deep emotional wounds that are hidden from the naked eye. But to win, we must preserve – we must move forward.

Why is it the smallest things that tear us down
My world’s nothing when you’re gone
I’m out here without a shield – can’t go back, now
Both hands tied behind my back for nothing, oh, no
These times when we climb so fast to fall, again


Why we gotta fall for it, now…
I realize that there are so many wounded souls needing to hear my story, so I must prepare, I must get ready for battle. Even though I am afraid I realize that fear is not of Him, but of the one who imitates Him. I prepare with everything that is within me, I prepare as I look over the field that will soon host the battle – for a way to defeat my enemy.

Mindfields

I never meant to start a war
You know, I never wanna hurt you
Don’t even know what we’re fighting for
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
Why does love always feel like
Can’t swallow our pride

It’s hard when you have to keep silent in a relationship, in order to avoid confrontation, because you don’t know what might trigger a reaction. So you walk around cautiously, avoiding saying anything – for fear that the even the right thing could be the wrong thing. It’s extremely hard uncovering each land mine that has been set there to first injure, and then destroy you.  So you wait, you rehearse what to say and what not to say in your mind, because if you say the wrong thing – it might be your last. Everything is a ticking time bomb ready to explode, anything can trigger a reaction. Something that happened last week or even a year ago can set him off. So you study the layout of the land. The wrong move could cost you your life. And if you aren’t careful, it just might. The land mines could be too many drinks, or a bad day at work, or the kids getting on his nerves. Anything and everything is a potential land mine when you are at war.  A person never really knows what weapons of destruction are hidden within the soul of the enemy we call our spouse, or lover.

Neither of us wanna raise that flag, mmm
If we can’t surrender
Then, we’re both gonna what we have, oh, no
Both hands tied behind my back for nothing (nothing), oh, no
These times when we climb so fast to fall, again
I don’t wanna fall for it, now…

Prisoner of war

I never meant to start a war
You know, I never wanna hurt you
Don’t even know what we’re fighting for
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
Better go and get your armor (get your armor), get your armor (get your armor)
I guess you better go and get your armor (get your armor), get your armor (get your armor)

God, only You know my struggle and only You know how I have survived being held captive for so long. I’ve become a prisoner in my own home. My prayer is to one day escape, to be free from the secrets that are hidden behind closed doors. I am in a battle and my goal is to survive. Each night I pray, asking God to show me a way out. I battle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. It’s extremely hard having someone dictate to you rules and regulations when you yourself are an adult. And as a prisoner of war you never know what method of torture your captor will use against you. It could be a gun, or it could be the threat of keeping your children from you – or simply mind games to break you, to break your spirit. He uses anything to make you surrender – to beg for mercy. Your captor enjoys watching you suffer because it’s a sick twisted game to him. One never knows what they will use to attack you with each day. It’s a game that constantly changes from day to day. It’s almost like the childhood story of “ See Spot Run” – because like Spot, you run from room to room trying to escape the beatings. You wonder at what price your freedom will come. But the one thing a wounded soul knows is that escape is immanent. Every prisoner of war constantly thinks of how they can escape, and now you have realized that you aren’t any different from the soldiers returning from war – except that the war you fight is in your own home. So you pray, and you wait  for answers. Because unlike others, to date – joy has not come in the morning. So you wait just like Elijah did for the rain. And have faith that the rain will come now that you are preparing for war. You become Ester – and if you perish, you perish. But you won’t, because the King has prepared you, not to be defeated – but for victory!

Battlefield :

https://n8tivegirl.com/2015/05/14/battlefield/

https://firstadam.wordpress.com/2015/05/28/battlefield-ii/

The end of the war

I guess you better go and get your
We could pretend that we are friends, tonight (oh)
And, in the morning, we wake up, and we’d be alright
‘Cause, baby, we don’t have to fight
And I don’t want this love to feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
I guess you better go and get your armor…

Aftermath:

https://n8tivegirl.com/2015/07/09/aftermath/

PTSD (Post traumatic stress disorder)

I never meant to start a war
You know, I never wanna hurt you
Don’t even know what we’re fighting for
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
I guess you better go and get your armor (get your armor), get your armor (get your armor)
I guess you better go and get your armor (get your armor), get your armor (get your armor)
Why does love always feel like (oh, oh)
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield
I never meant to start a war
Don’t even know what we’re fighting for
I never meant to start a war
Don’t even know what we’re fighting for

By: Jordin Sparks

Some people never recover nor move on from that prisoner of war syndrome. The battle has made them a victim instead of the victor. And unfortunately they carry the emotional wounds and baggage into their future. They could be made whole, yet they refuse. That victim mentality is their lifeline and what they cling to so tightly. They are so emotionally damaged and confused that they are unable to have a stable relationship, or what we would call normal. They can’t even begin to know what true love and intimacy is because they won’t let go of the fear. Their view of love is that of a victim, not the victor, so they go from relationship to relationship seeking something that only He can give. It’s a thirst that keeps them forever thirsty. However it can be quenched, but only if they are brave enough to trust Him.  Once you have been delivered and set free from your captivity you are a new creation. But it takes a person who is willing to be set free, and not allow the ghosts of his or her past to constantly haunt them. You have to realize that He only wants the best for you. He has delivered you from bondage, but yet you victimize yourself by refusing to let go. You refuse to let go of the wounds. It’s almost as if you have turned into the abuser – for you are now at war with yourself, within your own mind. You’ve become like the one from whom you escaped and have become destructive, sabotaging and preventing yourself from being happy. You must realize that the fight has been won, that you have won – that you are indeed the victor and not the victim. It’s time to own it, to embrace it, to live it. The armor that you put on to deliver yourself from war is the same armor you need to wear on a daily basis. Its’ not to be taken off – ever! The shield of faith that protects has always been there for you. So there are no excuses to remain in captivity. The post traumatic stress disorder is a thing of the past, and your past lies behind you. You are a new creation in CHRIST, and behold all things have become new. And everything that you lived through and all that you survived – is testimony for you to use to help facilitate the deliverance of other captives. To warn them of the WAR and what it looks like. To help them become VICTORS. Step out on faith, disrobe and leave your burial clothes behind you. Put on the new robe that He is waiting to put on you, and allow Salvation to win. You are a General in a different army now, and He needs strong soldiers to fight with Him. The battles of the past are over – because the victory has already been won.

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