“I Thought It Was Love”

I don’t think I’ve ever been in love.

I’ve been close…

or at least, I thought I was.

I’ve felt the rush.

The excitement.

The kind of connection that makes your heart beat faster

and your thoughts move quicker than your discernment.

I’ve called it love.

But now, looking back…

I realize it had more to do with how it made me feel

than what it actually was.

⸻

I’ve been infatuated.

Drawn to potential.

Captivated by attention.

Pulled in by what could be instead of what was.

I’ve been in lust.

Confusing chemistry with connection.

Mistaking desire for depth.

Feeling something strong… but not something steady.

⸻

And maybe that’s why it always felt like something I had to hold together.

Because real love…

doesn’t need to be forced to stay.

⸻

I’m not ashamed of it.

I’m aware of it.

Because you can’t recognize real love

if you’ve never stopped to question

what you’ve been calling it.