N8tivegirl

The One I Ignored Who Never Left

by Valrelyn Parson

There are moments in life when silence settles into a relationship so deeply that it becomes normal.

At first, it is subtle.

You forget the small things.

The simple questions.

“How was your day?”

“I missed you.”

“I love you.”

Eventually, the silence grows comfortable.

Two people can sit in the same room, share the same life, and yet feel like strangers.

It becomes easier not to speak.

Easier not to notice.

Easier to pretend the distance does not exist.

And over time, silence becomes its own kind of companion.

But silence has a cost.

Because when you stop speaking, you also stop sharing.

You stop running to the person who once meant everything.

You stop telling them about your fears, your disappointments, your victories, and your pain.

The little things that once mattered slowly disappear.

Not because love is gone.

But because neglect has quietly taken its place.

Time has a way of softening wounds, but the scars remain.

And I often wondered why you stayed.

Why you never walked away.

Because if the roles were reversed, perhaps I would have.

There were moments when I ignored you for days.

Sometimes weeks.

Sometimes longer.

I only came to you when I needed something.

When life fell apart.

When someone else hurt me.

When the promises of the world failed me.

I chased after other things.

Other loves.

Other distractions.

Things that looked exciting in the moment but never stayed long enough to hold me when everything fell apart.

Yet every time the world broke my heart…

You were still there.

Waiting.

Listening.

Holding me close as if I had never left.

And that is the part that confused me the most.

Why stay?

Why love someone who takes you for granted?

Why forgive someone who keeps running away?

Why welcome back someone who constantly chooses other things over you?

I was angry at your silence.

Because you never judged me.

You never shamed me.

You never forced me to return.

Instead, you simply waited.

Patient.

Faithful.

Unmoved.

And eventually the weight of that kind of love became unbearable.

Because guilt has a way of exposing truth.

I knew what I had done.

I knew how many times I had turned my back.

How many times I chose temporary pleasures over something real.

How many times I walked through life pretending you didn’t exist.

Yet you never left.

So I finally stopped running.

I stopped pretending.

I stopped fighting a love that refused to abandon me.

And standing there in the middle of my own mess…

I surrendered.

Not because I deserved forgiveness.

But because I realized it had already been given.

You were never the one who left.

I was.

And still…

You stayed.

Closer than a brother.

More patient than any human love could ever be.

Waiting for the moment I would finally understand.

Now I know what real love looks like.

It is not loud.

It is not forceful.

It does not demand attention.

It simply remains.

Steady.

Unmovable.

Faithful.

And now I know who you are.

You are the love I ignored.

The voice I silenced.

The presence I walked past a thousand times.

Yet you never turned away from me.

You were always there.

With open arms.

Waiting.

Loving.

Forgiving.

And now I finally understand.

You were never asking for perfection.

Only my heart.

So here I am.

No more running.

No more silence.

No more pretending.

I surrender completely.

Because the truth is…

I was never alone.

I was simply loved by a God who refused to leave.

© Valrelyn Parson